Self-love is an underrated powerful force that can transform your life in numerous ways.
Valentine’s Day is often associated with romantic love. It is a beautiful day to express our love for our romantic love, family, and friends. But what about the most important person in your life, YOU? What about the love we should have for ourselves? The truth is, self-love is one of the most important things we can practice, not just on Valentine’s Day but every day.
I have been through times when I had self-doubt and thought unworthy of myself. Very quickly, I started attracting failures, frustration, and agony. Remember what Rumi says, “What you seek is seeking you.” Fortunately, I came across the books; I’m Enough by Marisa Peer, Inner Engineering by Sadhguru, and talks by Amy Cudy, Vishen Lakhiani, and Mahatria. It changed my life forever.
Self-love is about accepting and loving ourselves unconditionally. It’s about recognizing your strengths and weaknesses and embracing them both. When we love ourselves, we treat ourselves with kindness, compassion, and respect. We prioritize our physical, mental, and emotional well-being.
Many will call you selfish if you are in self-love. But the truth is that self-love is about respecting and valuing yourself. If you don’t love yourself, it’s difficult to expect someone else to love you. Self-love is the foundation of healthy relationships. When we love and accept ourselves, we can better connect with others on a deeper level. We’re more confident in our interactions with others and more likely to attract positive and supportive people into our lives.
Self-love improves emotional well-being. Research has shown that self-love can help reduce stress, anxiety, and depression. When you love and accept yourself, you’re better able to manage your emotions and handle difficult situations.
Self-love is also linked to higher levels of self-esteem. When you value yourself, you’re more likely to feel confident in your abilities and trust your judgment. This can lead to greater success in various areas of your life, such as work, relationships, and personal goals. Self-love can even help you become more resilient in the face of adversity. When you have a strong sense of self-worth, you’re better able to bounce back from setbacks and persevere through challenging times.
The key question is, if self-love is so important, why is it so uncommon or hard to practice? For many of us, it’s because we’ve been conditioned to believe love is a transaction or emotional exchange between two people. We’re taught to put others first and to prioritize their needs above our own. This can make it difficult to prioritize self-care and to love ourselves truly.
Another obstacle to self-love is our inner critic. This voice in our head tells us we’re not good enough, smart enough, or worthy enough. It’s the voice that nitpicks at our flaws and mistakes and makes us feel inadequate. Overcoming our inner critic is a crucial step in practicing self-love.
What are the signs that you are in self-love?
Pursuing Your Passions — When you prioritize your interests and pursue your passions, you show yourself love and respect. This could mean taking up a new hobby, enrolling in a class to learn a new skill, or pursuing a career you are truly passionate about.
Forgiving Yourself — We all make mistakes and have moments of weakness. However, we are not practicing self-love when we hold onto these moments and beat ourselves up over them. Learning to forgive yourself and move on is a powerful act of self-love that can help you let go of negative emotions and focus on the present moment.
Prioritizing Self-Care — Taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally is vital to self-love. This could mean anything from getting enough sleep, eating healthy, and exercising to practicing mindfulness, getting therapy, or taking a mental health day to recharge.
Embracing Your Authentic Self — When we try to be someone else, we generally want to please others or fit in. We are not practicing self-love. Embracing your authentic self is a powerful act of self-love that can help you feel more confident and secure in who you are.
Creating boundaries and learning to say NO — many people struggle to say “no” to others, fearing they will disappoint or upset them. However, when you learn to set boundaries and prioritize your needs, you practice self-love. This could mean declining an invitation to an event you don’t want to attend or telling a friend that you can’t help them with something that will take up too much of your time and energy.
Self-love is a step toward exploring your potential because it removes self-doubt and helps overcome social pressures and attempts to hold you back. Some well-known people attribute self-love to their achievements. Examples include:
Michelle Obama: The former First Lady has strongly advocated for self-care and self-love. In her memoir Becoming, she writes, “I have learned that as long as I hold fast to my beliefs and values — and follow my own moral compass — then the only expectations I need to live up to are my own.”
Malala Yousafzai: The Nobel laureate and activist for girls’ education has advocated for self-love and self-care. In an interview with The Guardian, she said, “You have to love yourself and know your own worth…you have to take care of your mind, body, and spirit to be able to make a difference in the world.”
This Valentine, do a little self-talk and tell yourself that you have everything you need to be what you want to be. Remove every self-doubt, prioritize yourself, look in the mirror with a sense of pride, and say, I’m in love with myself, I’m abundant, and I’m ready to take on the world. Let the magic unfold.
I’m grateful for your time in reading this blog. In the comments section, let me know your experience and perspective on the subject. Please share the blog with your friends if you enjoyed reading it.